oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to summon your inner elephant
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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