you mean i was at the winter classic?
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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