Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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