and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
Randomize