Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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