Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
No subtext here. People are naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize