My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize