Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
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Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
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Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
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