i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's not a foreskin expert like you
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
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