i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
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