im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
don't judge my taste in strippers
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
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