I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
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