He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
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