Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
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They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
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My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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