i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize