Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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