wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize