I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
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