if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
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