Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
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