My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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