is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
In America we eat man semen.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize