Can Purell be used as lube?
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
