so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
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