I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
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