Dual....:-)
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize