the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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