Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
