everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize