I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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