Hey man sorry I got all grabby
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize