Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
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