The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize