is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
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He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
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Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
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