Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I enjoy the company of your penis
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize