Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
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Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
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I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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