there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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