Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
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Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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