There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
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Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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