I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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