Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize