Texts From Last Night

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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.

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  (267): i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE. http://tfl.nu/7rd6
  Replies (56) Good night (7085) Bad night (1019) Order T-Shirt
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  (772): View more from Florida

  I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.

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  (772): I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring. http://tfl.nu/9i68
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  (518): View more from New York

  Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.

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  (518): Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion. http://tfl.nu/ju2t
  Replies (49) Good night (2733) Bad night (474) Order T-Shirt
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  (813): View more from Florida

  Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.

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  (813): Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear. http://tfl.nu/hyjr
  Replies (20) Good night (627) Bad night (6378) Order T-Shirt
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?

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  (978): one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket? http://tfl.nu/emia
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  (416): View more from Ontario

  Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.

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  (416): Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only. http://tfl.nu/udpk
  Replies (33) Good night (4524) Bad night (891)
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  (606): View more from Kentucky

  how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.

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  (606): how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked. http://tfl.nu/j1kr
  Replies (20) Good night (1055) Bad night (4621) Order T-Shirt
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  (409): View more from Texas

  First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.

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  (409): First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance. http://tfl.nu/3lur
  Replies (32) Good night (9431) Bad night (1811) Order T-Shirt
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.

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  (778): I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm. http://tfl.nu/ttig
  Replies (6) Good night (780) Bad night (3252) Order T-Shirt
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups

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  (724): I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups http://tfl.nu/pn1i
  Replies (5) Good night (1944) Bad night (540) Order T-Shirt
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt

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  (219): Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt http://tfl.nu/6y5k
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.

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  (203): some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed. http://tfl.nu/br4z
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist

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  (336): I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist http://tfl.nu/uq4m
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"

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  (573): He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut" http://tfl.nu/oeuu
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  (320): View more from Minnesota

  So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.

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  (320): So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian. http://tfl.nu/850i
  Replies (2) Good night (1051) Bad night (601) Order T-Shirt

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