I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize