I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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