Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
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