I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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