idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
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i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
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Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
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