I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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