evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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