I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize